February 15, 2010

i am home with a cold and have no one to take care of me (where are you moy!). here is a list of things that are necessary to do when you are sick.

1. drink ridiculous amounts of arizona diet green tea. i'm talking at least a gallon a day. this is very important for hydration.

2. find some sort of marathon on television, the dumber the better. this is necessary in order to lose track of time and to rest the mind. after 5 hours of tool academy 3, anyone would feel better.

3. you're going to need soup. my soup of choice is crisper's italian chicken vegetable. it's a limited time soup, so i am considering buying 10 quarts and freezing them. i wonder if that's allowed....

yummy split pea soup found on weheartit

4. more likely than not, you are going to have some sort of homework/work/obligation you are going to have to do while you are sick. this is so unfair and terrible, but there is no way around it. if you have meetings or work, just pretend that you aren't sick. if you do let on that you are sick, be prepared to be treated like the town leper until you feel better. no one has any qualms against treating a sick person like biohazardous waste. i understand that no one wants to be sick, but stop being ridiculous. being nice to a sick person won't get you sick. being an asshole will get you sick. remember a little thing called karma.

5. most of all, you need to sleep for the majority of the day. being sick is terrible, but to get rid of a cold, you need to rest rest rest! preferably with a cat named alfie on your head

here is alfie showing you his goods

now i'm off to watch more hoarders!

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